Here's what happened. My sinuses were so bad yesterday morning that I couldn't hear out of my right ear and the right side of my face so clogged and heavy that I was literally off-balance. That's not fun! I tried to make an appointment to go see my doc. No luck. The earliest I could get in was tomorrow (Friday). I made the appointment anyway, and then promptly went a-searching teh Interwebs to see if I could find something -- anything! -- that would provide some immediate relief.
After learning more about my sinuses than I ever wanted (did you know that most people after age 30-40 can hold up to 2 full cups of mucus, dust, pollen, and other substances in their sinus cavity? ewww), I hit on some home cures. After ruling out things like standing on my head, plunging my head into a bucket of ice water, or squirting onion juice up into my nose, I decided to try sniffing cayenne pepper. That's right, I was desperate enough to snort cayenne! But don't be alarmed. I too was quite concerned about the potential negative effects of this cure, and so went about it very cautiously. I took the tiniest pinch imaginable (4-6 grains?) and sniffed about half of that. I waited a minute or two. Other than a faint and surprisingly not-unpleasant sensation of warmth in my nose and back of my throat, nothing happened. Cautiously emboldened, I sniffed the rest of the tiny pinch. The warmth increased, although again not unpleasantly so. Within minutes my sinuses began to drain. I will spare you the nasty details. Suffice it to say that after about a half hour, maybe forty-five minutes, the clog was unclogged, balance was restored, and I could hear out of my right ear again. Even better, it's stayed unclogged. All praise the curative effects of cayenne pepper, hallelujah!
If I'd been really bold and snorted a bunch all at once, I suppose I would have been fixed immediately -- but I think I also would have been in cayenne-induced agony. In this case, less was truly more. Anyway, the next time your sinuses are clogged, consider reaching for a teeny little bit of cayenne pepper. Or not; really, you've got to be rather desperate to try this one. But for what it's worth, it worked. I've even canceled tomorrow's doctor's appointment.
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Since the haircuts last week, I've had a lot of people tell me that their girls with their short hair look a lot like me. I dunno. I think that they look a lot like both of us. From my short, stocky point-of-view, they hit the genetic jackpot by getting their daddy's build: tall and lean. (Poor, poor things. To be fated to be tall and slim -- oh, the horror! I don't know how they'll endure it.../end false sympathy)
They've got my eyes and their daddy's build, and the rest is this combination of us that I think is uniquely them. But I don't know. What do you think? I just got my hair cut this morning, so here's a quick one of me (sorry, my arms aren't long enough for some better perspective and I didn't feel like setting up the tripod and remote), one of Pete from last summer, and the girls:
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A life-sized Lucian Freud painting of a sleeping, naked woman has set a new world record price for a work by a living artist.
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It went for £17.2m ($33.6m). That's a lot of clams. Is it art? A challenge to our current cultural conception of beauty? Something else?
I don't know what I think. But if I were going to spend $33.6 million on a painting, I probably wouldn't buy this one.
3 comments:
I am the thinking you could not pay *me* to own that painting. Or display it, anyway. Well, ok, it'd hafta' be quite a bit of money.
J
Ugh. The woman in that painting looks like she's sleeping off a bad night that she probably won't remember when she wakes up.
It's really something, isn't it! I'm reminded of Rubens -- but whereas I would actually buy a Rubens painting if I had enough clams, this one...um...not so much.
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